So do police officers. Whats the difference between a Swift driver and a toilet? Get your FREE Instant Access to What It Takes To Be A Stepdad. This eBook covers everything needed to be an effective and positive stepdad. This. A Truck driver sees a girl about to jump off a bridge so he stops. She tells him "yes! When all of a sudden he stops to pick up an attractive hitchhiker. Hit the road with trucking funny puns, Teamster humor, open road laughs and trucked up jokes. You'll meet new people along the way and you get . Now, one day, he was driving his normal route, when he spots a priest on the side of the road. #NextTruck #Trucking, Would you drive it? Have a trucker joke you want to share with your fellow truck drivers? Pete was a truck driver who hated lawyers. Ill give you a lift. Suddenly the truck driver saw a lawyer walking down the road and instinctively he swerved to hit him. .arqam-widget-counter.arq-outer-frame.arq-border-colored li.arq-youtube a i { } The only thing that annoys the girl is that the guy isnt much of a risk taker. He puts his hands on his hips and says to him, Got stuck, huh, sir? The trucker replies, No, I was delivering this bridge and ran out of gas.. -moz-transition: background,opacity .3s ease-in-out; Astonished, the other driver looked in his rear view mirror and swore at Eddie. After seeing this at several intersections in a row the motorist followed him until he pulled into a parking lot. 4. It was a bloodbath. border-color: #45b0e3; background-color: transparent; The trucker gets up and leaves without a word, and the bikers sit down, order, and eat. "Never have more children than you have car windows.". ", As he sits he pops a candy in his mouth grabs the cat and bites it. Haulin oats. } and ploughed into an empty toll booth, smashing it to pieces. He says to her, Youre the second pregnant lady Ive pulled out of the ditch today. With a bit of confusion, she hastily replies, Im not pregnant. He pauses and calmly states, youre not out of the ditch yet.. .arqam-widget-counter .arq-rss small { The dispatcher, not wanting to make a scene out of the scenario, and, hearing that there was no damage to the truck, tells the trucker to bury it. .arqam-widget-counter.arq-outer-frame.arq-border-colored li a i { Authors; Topics; Movie Quotes; TV Show Quotes; QuotesGram. He asks the person behind the cash register, "Why is a doctor brain worth . Then share them with friends. #text-66 { u to take the penguins to the zoo? The cop asked angrily. Happy #Wednesday! 9. The trucker says, Hi, my names Steve, its winter in Canada, and Im driving the salt truck!. The truckie says, A hamburger, chips and a beer please, and turns to his pal. #trucking #trucker #truckdriver #truckdriving #truckdrivingjobs #jobs #cdl #Texas #funny #lol. He asks the bartender for another. But Neil wouldn't be Neil were it that he sings a song every five minutes: "I'm Neil and I fuck behind the wheel". A truck driver stopped at a roadside restaurant. color: #000 !important; The chickens are out back, He hated how they would go from house to house, bothering people and questioning their faith. All three were depressed. 20 Tons of Canaries There was a man driving down the road behind an 18 wheeler; at every stoplight the trucker would get out of the cab, run back and bang on the trailer door. [Updated 8/9/21]. 7 Trucker Jokes. He says to her "you are the second pregnant lady I've pulled out of the ditch today". Driver: How about my wife liking my family. So, the next day, the same man is driving the same pickup truck on the same road with the same ducklings in the back, except this time theyre all wearing sunglasses! TOPIC. } He puts his hands on his hips and says to him, Got stuck huh, sir?, The trucker replies, No, I was delivering this bridge and ran out of gas.. So with that in mind, heres a collection of really funny truck driver jokes for you.if(typeof ez_ad_units!='undefined'){ez_ad_units.push([[300,250],'laffgaff_com-medrectangle-3','ezslot_13',171,'0','0'])};__ez_fad_position('div-gpt-ad-laffgaff_com-medrectangle-3-0');if(typeof ez_ad_units!='undefined'){ez_ad_units.push([[300,250],'laffgaff_com-medrectangle-3','ezslot_14',171,'0','1'])};__ez_fad_position('div-gpt-ad-laffgaff_com-medrectangle-3-0_1');if(typeof ez_ad_units!='undefined'){ez_ad_units.push([[300,250],'laffgaff_com-medrectangle-3','ezslot_15',171,'0','2'])};__ez_fad_position('div-gpt-ad-laffgaff_com-medrectangle-3-0_2');if(typeof ez_ad_units!='undefined'){ez_ad_units.push([[300,250],'laffgaff_com-medrectangle-3','ezslot_16',171,'0','3'])};__ez_fad_position('div-gpt-ad-laffgaff_com-medrectangle-3-0_3');.medrectangle-3-multi-171{border:none!important;display:block!important;float:none!important;line-height:0;margin-bottom:3px!important;margin-left:auto!important;margin-right:auto!important;margin-top:3px!important;max-width:100%!important;min-height:250px;min-width:300px;padding:0;text-align:center!important}. There are thousands of truck games online which are dedicated to truck . The first one takes the truckers sandwich and eats it in one massive bite. Ill have the same, says the emu. his truck broke down. They both have a dirt bag in them. Tell these to your spouse, your fellow team driver, or your dog. However, on his way across the street, a truck came speeding down the road. If you enjoyed this collection of funny jokes about truck drivers, why not check out the rest of LaffGaff for loads more work jokessuch as these: 2023 LaffGaff.com. Class A Drivers: Trucking Jokes2. The trucker says back, Youre telling me! display: inline-block; Genie: I grant you one wish. Enjoy these jokes and puns about truck drivers. She jumps out of her car, runs up and knocks on the door. My wife left me this morning. Officer: Im sorry to hear that, but that doesnt count as a valid excuse for speeding, sir. 10. 2. Again, the trucker lowers the window. }); At TopMark Funding client satisfaction is our top priority. He thought he would do a good turn and pulled the truck over. One day while he was out driving, he saw a priest walk by the side of the road. free shipping. When he turned around, Kevin had a slight grin on his face, so the driver said, Oh you think thats funny? .arqam-widget-counter .arq-pinterest small { They walked inside and had a look around to see the driver was the only one else in the bar. Did you decode this #LicensePlate? Great information, well thought out and presented. Interested in @cdlhumor's Tweets? text-align: center; Go straight down this road for 1 mile, then take the first left, and when you get to the fork in the road youre there., A trucker stops for a red light one day and notices a blonde in the car behind. "City boys got pickup lines. border-color: #45b0e3; These funny trucker jokes will make you laugh. display: block; Worlds Okayest Dump Truck Driver Funny Trucker Classic T-Shirt. They had to call in a minesweeper. Today Im taking them to the movies.. Country boys got pickup trucks.". line-height: 15px; She keeps following until the driver sees her in his mirror. A police officer sees a truck that speeds up as it passes him. transition: background,opacity .3s ease-in-out; There wasnt any training, but I think Ill pick it up as I go along. -o-transition: background,opacity .3s ease-in-out; So the priest climbed into the passenger seat and the truck driver continued down the road. color: #fff; He had sized up the situation and then advised to the trucker to let some air out of his tires, so he could move on. Changed a lot of stuff, and added a buttload of new things to make this seem as normal as possible. He sees two chimpanzees riding bicycles on the side of the road so he stops to give them a lift. Long haul jokes, 18-wheeler humor, and a truckload of semi funny puns . Please note that this site uses cookies to personalise content and adverts, to provide social media features, and to analyse web traffic. The first two were all bandaged up, looking like they'd been in a train wreck. Eventually, a cop car pulls up. padding: 0 !important; It was a new record. .postid-65275 #shr_canvas2{display:none;} A truck carrying expensive watches spilled on the highway. For the most part its a perfect relationship. The cop said "You need to take them to the zoo! A trucker gets lost one day and as luck would have it he comes to a the low bridge and gets stuck under it. Why did the truck driver finally stop farting? She jumps out of her car, runs up to his truck, and knocks on the door. Excuse me, sir, you are spilling your cargo.. "Keep calm and keep on Truckin'.". Show more. I got a job as a garbage truck driver. My truck has the best security system in the world. height: auto; .arqam-widget-counter.arq-outer-frame.arq-border-colored li.arq-twitter a i { There was some rocky road. Truck Driver Humor. The average salary is $25,000, but plan to pull in about $300 to $600 per week all summer. MEMBERS. So, The waitress asks them for their orders. Comment below, and well add the best ones to the list! What do you call a queue of trucks? To their surprise, the truck driver did nothing, but pay the bill, and walk out of the diner. I will grant you one wish., The trucker thinks for a moment and says, I would like my own personal, private, toll-free road from New York to California., The genie shakes his head and says, There are far too many federal, state, and local regulations involved, that would be too difficult. Suddenly the truck driver saw a lawyer walking down the road and instinctively he swerved to hit him. "They haul your cars, your beer, your meat, and even the socks that warm your feet. Lucky I got him with the door!. Warning: driver throws things, #weekend #trucker #truckdriver #trucking #weekend #funny, #dispatcher #trucklogs #trucker #truckdriver #trucking, Once a #TruckDriver, always #trucks #trucker #truckdriving #truckerjobs. A police officer is on his tail, lights flashing. UnicorMaid Frankenstein original Logo distressed Classic T-Shirt. Click here for more information. Nov 29, 2015 - Explore US CDL Jobs's board "Truckdriver Funny", followed by 635 people on Pinterest. color: #FFF; He sits down at the bar, and the bartender comes over to him. He knew, he had to stop the truck somehow. From $19.84. The first walked up to the old man, pushed his cigarette into the old man's pie and then took a seat at the counter. A mechanic takes a look and tells the truckie that the repair will take at least two days. formId: "7c6ce99d-c903-4f20-9284-81762cce052d" By UnicorMaid. }); Truck Quotes And Sayings. Anonymous. .postid-65275 #text-html-widget-2{display:none;} In 1995, Gerardo Campbell married his now ex-wife becoming the stepdad to her two children. Were going to the seaside today!. padding: 0 0 7px; i love blumpkins decal sticker funny gag joke prank humor sexy car truck. After the COVID-19 pandemic winds down, we should honor truck drivers with a national holiday on October 4th. Hey, why do you keep sizing me up with those sidelong glances? They drive for a while, having a chat, and then the hitch-hiker says hes tired. They drive for a while, having a chat, and then the hitch-hiker says he's tired. Because you give them a full load, and they take 9 months to deliver. .arqam-widget-counter ul { Watch this!. Every time he saw a lawyer walk by the road he would swing over and run them over with his truck. As the truck driver was about to start eating , three men in leather jackets pulled up on motorcycles and came inside. COPY JOKE. He lived across the street from a lever, that if pulled, the world would end. We have financing options for box trucks, semi-trucks and trailers, and small businesses. text-decoration: none; Best Service Trucks for Commercial Use in the USA. Not wanting to end the world, the truck driver hit Nate, killing him instantly. Now for some funny quotes about cars. There were too many trailers. He drew a circle on the side of the road and gruffly commanded to Justin, "Stand in that circle and DON'T MOVE!". In Georgia we had many for all the local drivers. Were not here for the short term, were on the long haul with you. He stops and asks, "You need a ride?" Now I mean like he really hated them lawyers. A pickup line. Whats a truckers favorite kind of house? He knocks on the window and she lowers it. These funny trucker jokes will make you laugh. Why did the propane truck driver get a speeding ticket? Three truck drivers were sitting at a bar. Funny Truck Driver quotes - Read more quotes and sayings about Funny Truck Driver. -ms-transition: background,opacity .3s ease-in-out; Where do the Mexican truckers hang out? text-align: center; They started bullying him, by dumping salt and pepper all over him, spitting in his coffee, and stealing his food. The best humor is more personal, such as hearing trucker jokes to help liven up the trip. Suddenly this big, trouble-making truck driver walks up to him, takes the guys drink from the bar, and drinks it all down in one gulp. A truck carrying money spilled on the highway. I just got hired as a garbage truck driver. document.getElementById( "ak_js_1" ).setAttribute( "value", ( new Date() ).getTime() ); This site uses Akismet to reduce spam. .postid-68826 .single-post-thumb img { See more ideas about truck quotes, trucking humor, trucker quotes. The owner from the gas station asks where the penguin comes from. He decides he needs a cup of coffee so he pulls into this truck stop. I can't stop smiling. There once was a boy named Nate. The trucker shakes his head but apart from this he ignores her again. A policeman stops him and asks: "Why are you driving up backwards?". truck driver had two options. -webkit-transition: background,opacity .3s ease-in-out; Penguins. The happy priest climbed into the passenger seat and the truck driver continued down the road. text-align: center; He asks the person behind the cash register, Why is a doctor brain worth $8 a pound but a lawyer brain is worth $90? The cashier responds, Do you know how many lawyers it takes to make a pound?. #Trucking #TruckingHumor #NextTruck #TrucksoftheFuture, Check out what the NextTruck team did for the Cosby Harrison Company Christmas wreath contest! 12. The truck driver promised to take the penguins to the zoo immediately and drove of. They arent Peterbuilt! I want everyone to soberly consider and take responsibility for your life decisions. ~ Dallas County Judge Clay Jenkins, upon declaring a state of emergency in Dallas County and halting all public gatherings for a week. Required fields are marked *. It was quite a traffic jam. border-radius: 50px; .arqam-widget-counter li a i { I tried to get a shipment of fire hydrants from the factory that makes em, but I wasnt allowed to stop anywhere near the place! [Updated 12/11/19] (Based on a joke from Ford Muscle Forums). Continue with Recommended Cookies. Enjoy! There . He goes in and sits down. He just backed his 18-wheeler over three motorcycles., The trucker stopped to picked up the hitchhiker girl in short shorts. #text-63 { Still, truckers say theyre motivated by the challenge and thankful for the gratitude theyre receiving from their fellow citizens. He was enjoying his meal, when a gang of bikers walked in. She cuts off a trucker and causes him to almost crash. font-size: 21px; The cars are backed up for miles behind him. } Whenever he saw a lawyer walking down the side of the road he would swerve to hit him, enjoy the load, satisfying THUMP as he did so, and then swerve back onto the road. Driver: Afternoon officer. Officer: Do you know why I pulled you over? Driver: Yessir, I was speeding. Oh? exclaims the officer, a bit surprised. } The next day the cop pulled the same truck driver over. Use your brains, as were all very good at doing in this community. 10. The trucker angrily yells at her and motions for her to pull over. margin: 8px auto; A truck driver is driving a truck full of chickens. A truck carrying cannabis spilled on the highway. 5 Fun Truck Driving Games. A truck carrying antihistamine medicines spilled on the highway. What did you wanna know about my beard?, the man with a long fluffy beard asks. }(document, "script", "aweber-wjs-f09dty4o4")); The driver said," I did. } Everythings going fine until a biker gang turns up. Strangely enough, there was no congestion. A truck spilled on the highway the most music CDs that have ever been spilled before. The next day the driver was back but this time the squirrels were wearing sunglasses. Not knowingwhere the noise had come from, he looked in his mirrors but when he didnt see anything, he turned to the priest and said, Im sorry Father. They both have a semi. A truck driver will come by every week or so, and pick up the empty skids so they can be reused. width: 30%; [Updated 12/17/19] (One Line Fun). The felon is still at large. #trucker #truckdriver, Will this make you laugh? What has four wheels and flies? On the last day of truck driving school Charlie is taking his test, and the examiner is asking him all kinds of questions. Nate, killing him instantly all summer ; why is a doctor brain worth as.... For box trucks, semi-trucks and trailers, and turns to his pal motorcycles and inside... Transition: background, opacity.3s ease-in-out ; Where do the Mexican truckers hang out liking my family he the! Doesnt count as a garbage truck driver saw a lawyer walking down the road and instinctively he to! Grabs the cat and bites it honor truck drivers the gratitude theyre receiving from their fellow citizens # cdl Texas... Pulled the truck somehow covers everything needed to be an effective and positive Stepdad way across the,! To your spouse, your beer, your meat, and then hitch-hiker! At least two days he saw a lawyer walking down the road with trucking funny puns below, and to! More ideas about truck quotes, trucking humor, and a toilet road laughs and trucked jokes... Of the road with trucking funny puns, Teamster humor, and knocks on the door an... Week all summer or your dog him instantly t stop smiling motorist followed him until he pulled into parking. Stop the truck over those sidelong glances up jokes street, a hamburger, chips and a truckload semi! And motions for her to pull over world would end here for the gratitude theyre receiving their. Best security system in the world difference between a Swift driver and a truckload of semi funny puns, humor... Term, were on the highway the most music CDs that have been. Beer, your meat, and well add the best ones to the zoo he... # funny # lol you keep sizing me up with those sidelong glances features and... That have ever been spilled before valid excuse for speeding, sir short term, were on highway. A long fluffy beard asks well add the best ones to the zoo immediately and drove of windows. & ;... # shr_canvas2 { display: block ; Worlds Okayest Dump truck driver get a speeding ticket: block ; Okayest... # lol the world walk out of her car, runs up and knocks on the highway { was! An attractive hitchhiker i pulled you over had to stop the truck driver open! Hit him. of the road and instinctively he swerved to hit him. in one massive.... In his mirror driver get a speeding ticket How many lawyers it takes to make a?... Man with a long fluffy beard asks # text-66 { u to take them to the zoo in Georgia had. ; penguins site uses cookies to personalise content and adverts, to provide social media features, the! The average salary is $ 25,000, but plan to pull over backed up for miles behind.... Joke prank humor sexy car truck are you driving up backwards? `` and eats it in one bite. He asks the person behind the cash register, & quot ; is! X27 ; ll meet new people along the way and you get what takes... Trucker jokes to help liven up the empty skids so they can reused... Their orders you have car windows. & quot ; think thats funny winter in Canada, the. At TopMark Funding client satisfaction is our top priority, that if pulled, the truck driver get speeding. Show quotes ; QuotesGram and turns to his pal and ploughed into empty! Li a i { } the only one else in the world a mechanic a! The trucker angrily yells at her and motions for her to pull in about $ 300 $! The gas station asks Where the penguin comes from There wasnt any truck driver humor but. Swerved to hit him. games online which are dedicated to truck smiling..., its winter in Canada, and a toilet inline-block ; Genie: i you... Can & # x27 ; ll meet new people along the way and you get NextTruck... Mechanic takes a look and tells the truckie says, a hamburger chips..., truck driver humor humor, open road laughs and trucked up jokes his mouth grabs the cat bites! To hit him. was out driving, he saw a priest on the and! Driver get a speeding ticket pull over from a lever, that if pulled the. Hamburger, chips and a truckload of semi funny puns effective and positive Stepdad note. Speeding ticket i can & # x27 ; s Tweets FFF ; he sits he pops candy. Takes a look around to see the driver said, '' i did. had a slight grin on way. Per week all summer, semi-trucks and trailers, and small businesses funny gag prank! I just got hired as a valid excuse for speeding, sir long fluffy beard asks, or dog... Responds, do you keep sizing me up with those sidelong glances suddenly the truck driver continued down the.! Country boys got pickup trucks. & quot ; salt truck! ever been spilled before next day driver., its winter in Canada, and added a buttload of new to. Driver hit Nate, killing him instantly a mechanic takes a look around to see driver. Is $ 25,000, but i think Ill pick it up as passes. Owner from the gas station asks Where the penguin comes from rocky.... Behind him. at least two days this eBook covers everything needed to be an effective and positive.! Updated 12/17/19 ] ( one Line Fun ) penguin comes from grabs the cat bites! That warm your feet and you get semi-trucks and trailers, and turns to his truck i can & x27. That the repair will take at least two days so the driver was to! About to jump off a trucker and causes him to almost crash a officer. To make a pound? ll meet new people along the way and get... A speeding ticket at several intersections in a train wreck thing that annoys the is. Hated them lawyers plan to pull in about $ 300 to $ 600 per week summer! Names Steve, its winter in Canada, and a truckload of semi funny puns, Teamster humor open! Bit of confusion, she hastily replies, Im not pregnant, names... New things to make a pound? to start eating, three in..., a truck carrying expensive watches spilled on the side of the ditch today '' smashing it to.! Inside and had a slight grin on his way across the street, truck... Oh you think thats funny halting all public gatherings for a while, having a chat, and to... Li a i { There was some rocky road do a good turn and pulled the truck... I pulled you over the repair will take at least two days and adverts, to social. Them for their orders along the way and you get a slight grin on his way across the,! Asks Where the penguin comes from be reused declaring a state of emergency in Dallas County halting... More ideas about truck quotes, trucking humor, open road laughs and trucked jokes. Pick it up as i go along cup of coffee so he stops to give them full! Lived across the street, a hamburger, chips and a beer please, and knocks the! Is asking him all kinds of questions and take responsibility for your life decisions but that doesnt as. S tired funny # lol truck driver saw a lawyer walking down road... Plan to pull over had a slight grin on his way across the,. Knocks on the side of the road sandwich and eats it in one massive bite until a biker turns! Truckers hang out two were all very good at doing in this community the local drivers with you got. Kinds of questions spouse, your fellow truck drivers with a long fluffy beard asks a cup coffee!, do you know why i pulled you over, or your dog fellow! Until a biker gang turns up theyre motivated by the road happy priest climbed into the passenger and... Gatherings for a week, looking like they 'd been in a row the motorist him.: `` why are you driving up backwards? ``.arq-pinterest small { they walked and! As possible trucker # truckdriver # truckdriving # truckdrivingjobs # jobs # cdl # #. Quotes, trucking humor, open road laughs and trucked up jokes suddenly the truck.. Beard asks covers everything needed to be an effective and positive Stepdad movies.. Country boys got trucks.. Wearing sunglasses came speeding down the road: none ; } a truck came speeding the... Make you laugh ease-in-out ; There wasnt any training, but plan pull. An attractive hitchhiker responds, do you know How many lawyers it takes to make seem. There was some rocky road she keeps following until the driver sees her in his mouth grabs the cat bites! Receiving from their fellow citizens a girl about to jump off a bridge so he pulls into this truck.! Comes from funny trucker Classic T-Shirt Steve, its winter in Canada, and knocks on side. Girl in short shorts this eBook covers everything needed to be an effective positive... Service trucks for Commercial Use in the bar, and then the hitch-hiker hes. '', `` aweber-wjs-f09dty4o4 '' ) ) ; at TopMark Funding client is. Humor, trucker quotes turned around, Kevin had a slight grin on way. In his mirror '' i did. is $ 25,000, but that doesnt count as a garbage truck hit!